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githusb
VOL. I · NO. 34
HUSBAND MATERIAL REPORT
HUSBAND MATERIAL REPORT
PROFILE @JPARK · ANALYSIS COMPLETE
The Digital Hermit.
“When her first real cry in front of him occurs, he will offer a silent, confused nod and a glass of water.”
HUSBAND SCORE
34
/ 100
✓ STRENGTHS
01.Zero public drama in the commit history.
02.Unburdened by the validation of internet strangers.
03.Likely spends weekends doing things that aren't debugging.
⚠ RED FLAGS
01.Total lack of public footprint suggests a life lived in private silos.
02.Following only three people implies a highly curated, potentially impenetrable inner circle.
03.Seven years of account age with zero output indicates a commitment-phobic relationship style.
@jpark · Unknown · 7y experience
githusb.com/u/jpark
§ The full report
Five categories.
One uncomfortable portrait.
01
Work Ethic
Work ethic is currently a theoretical concept.
20
/100
›
RECEIPTS · STREAKS, FREQUENCY, NIGHT COMMITS
SIGNAL 01
“Zero commits in the last 90 days”
SIGNAL 02
“No public repositories maintained”
SIGNAL 03
“Total absence of open-source labor”
02
Emotional Stability
He is a blank slate, which is either peaceful or terrifying.
50
/100
›
03
Care for Others
Emotional availability is currently behind a private firewall.
30
/100
›
04
Aesthetic & Order
His life is organized in a way that excludes witnesses.
40
/100
›
05
Social Life
He treats social networking like a classified government operation.
10
/100
›